EXTRACTS FROM THE YUMMY MUMMY'S FAMILY HANDBOOK

THE KITCHEN: WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

This is a question that every mother is asked every few days, and often every few hours as her kids get older, and one to which she has to come up with a suitable answer. 'Suitable', in this case, means an answer that won't generate any of the following: a long, weighty sighhhh ; the word 'Yuk!'; or a face screwed up and disgusted as though you just said 'Pig shit and fried toenail clippings again, darling'.

Much better is to be able to say something that makes them appear to be pleased you bothered to go shopping and prepare the meal. When I go to all this trouble for them (and it is for them - when I'm on my own I am quite happy to eat the same dish for four days on the trot or live on toast and Marmite if it means I don't have to cook) and I am met with anything other than gratitude and pleasure, I want to throw my apron at the nearest ungrateful member of my family and shout: 'Well if you hate what I'm cooking so much, then YOU come up with something better! Your ten minutes start now - I'm off to read the paper!'

Given that this kind of storm-out would result in my children dying of scurvy, my husband turning into a ton of lard and all our money going to the local curry house, I generally just tell them to go away and come back when it's ready.

Which brings us to what you can rustle up in the frantic ten minutes between getting in from swimming lessons and having your starving family raid the biscuit tin. This is where some clever preparation and a Top Five Quick Family Meals list can save your bacon, so to speak. But hang on - what's that I see below? Well, if it isn't a Top Five Quick Family Meals list! Hope they like it.

[Want the list? Buy the book, baby! Buy the book!]